Lewis, Trailers and Cawley on the Brain

I feel compelled tonight.

Compelled by a conversation at work and subsequent blogging by my friend.

I have two best friends. We were supposed to move back to KC together after graduation. Start a cupcakery. Have a little house with Fourth Room (mind you not A fourth room.....Fourth Room). Eat our way through the city. Then as May loomed closer, Olivia had the opportunity to move to Florida. And now, here we are in August. I'm moving into my own little apartment North of the River this weekend. Becky just bought a trailer. And Liv is returning from Florida in a few short weeks.

Although we have all battled our bouts of disappointment at watching our idealistic dreams wither, tonight I just can't help but sit in awe. My two best friends are beautiful adventurers. Not afraid to take risks and do what they love. There is something so beautiful and freeing to me to see that despite how good our plans could have been in reality, this is it's own kind of lovely. C.S. Lewis says, "Good as it ripens, becomes continually more different not only from evil but from other good".

My pastor at Redeemer on Sunday bequeathed to us the line his uncle used at his wedding, and he subsequently has used at every wedding since. "You will best love your wife when you love her less than Jesus". Put a blank in there (or put a bird on it) and it's all encompassing.

We will best love everything else, when what we love is secondary to loving Jesus. That's where freedom is. Freedom from labels, jobs, relationships, expectations. I have to confess, I don't live in freedom in a lot of ways because I still love likeability more than I love Jesus a lot of days. I get frustrated when that is threatened and insecurity seeks in, choking me.

The three of us are adventuring in our own ways now. Independent living, vagabond living, and ambiguous living. Freedom to go, stay and be in between. I love watching people live expanding lives. Seeing experiences shape, comfort, shock, and rest people. My personality is such that I love the end result, but over the years the Father has developed such a deep seeded love of the process.

Lewis also describes life like a tree, branching out and separating as it grows, not heading toward unity. If that doesn't describe this stage of life right now, I don't know what does. This summer I have found a great responsibility in choosing my attitude about things. Choosing how you are going to react and move forward from an incident or lack thereof is so telling of ones character. As I'm wriggling around in this time of life, figuring out what adventure and freedom are for me, I'm being to see that I have to choose to embrace the different-good of others to find freedom in my own. Expectations and sameness will become weary very quickly.

Compelled writing isn't my best. It becomes a collage of thoughts stapled together. But I suppose if you want a little summary of where my head is tonight, here it is:

I want to best love adventuring, my friends, life, my job, beauty, etc, by loving them less than Jesus. I see others doing that, and it draws me in.

Don't Be Like Me

Well. I'm moving.

In two weeks I will be living large in 655 square feet of my very own. So my recent weekends have been spent shopping for the goods. Furniture, cookware, bedding etc. However, I am all about the freebies....and these babies are throw-backs from my childhood.

Many a birthday, dinner or chat with my mom occurred on these stools, and now they get to move on to bigger and better things.

Here's the deal. I'm twenty-two. This is my first time living on my own and I have no idea what in tarnation I'm doing when it comes to tutorials. But I repainted these green monsters and I'm gonna show you how to do it Emilie-Janky-Town Style.

Note: you probably should find people who actually know what they're doing if you ever are going to do this and you want your to turn out nice. I however, just tend to go for things. Some call this foolishness.....let's call it valiance.

The first step is to stare at the spray paint aisle, Instagram, stare some more, and decide on a color. You shouldn't be like me and spray a little bit on the price tag to see if you reeeeally like it.

Next step is to remove the seats from the chairs. Don't be like me and spend thirty minutes finagling newspaper and painters tape around the seats, only to realize you're four screws away from easy removal.

Sanding should occur next. Don't be like me and forget to wear gloves. Because then this happens...

Also. This is an example of how you probably shouldn't sand. I don't think the sand paper is supposed to look like this at the end.

Priming the chairs is important. But don't be like me and only get one can of primer....because you'll be angry later when it takes four cans of blue to cover. And you may react like this....

Then spray....one can

Two cans.....or toucans if you're feeling jolly

And four cans later I had the finished project. Don't be like me, buy a quart of paint....it's cheaper. 

They did turn out pretty fly for some blue guys if I do say so myself. 

But really. Don't be like me. 

Because then you make weird faces like this when you're finished.