Today I felt most normal I have in a long while. I journeyed with a friend into Springfield, and we just took the afternoon as it came. It started with a two hour long trip to Barnes and Noble. Something I have not indulged in in a while. I love sitting and reading, knowing that for however long I'm there, I won't be disturbed. The world around me slowly fades away as I plant myself between the bookshelves and engage into someone else's story. There's nothing like it. Meandering from the books to the magazines, I sat contentedly with Decor magazines, day-dreaming of the home I hope to have, and the crafts I wish I could afford to do. Even in my wistfulness, it was such a restful time.
Following that we ate at Panera. There is nothing like a bowl of hot chicken noodle soup on a brisk fall afternoon. Am I right? I say am I right?! Then to finish the evening we headed to Potter's House for some coffee time. Reading, writing, thinking. It was beautiful.
I haven't experienced this kind of restful bliss in a while. The kind where I just sit and smile. Unhurried, simple joys. They look different for everyone. And I think I've been forgetting what mine are until today. I can be very unfaithful to who the Lord created me to be, and the passions He's put inside me. Today He reignited some of those in me, and it's causing me to ask what I do for me and what I do because I think I need to for others. And not in the good way. I think the Lord is reminding me of the individual He created me to be, and I forgot how much I liked being her.
I was reminiscing about my senior year in high school, and I was remembering a certain friend who I remember just feeling so normal with. We never really did anything special, we just enjoyed the same things and so we did them. Coffee at various places, going to Barnes and Noble, driving around. Those are some of the most restful memories I have of high school, and it was a blessing to remember those today and to realize that what I enjoy is perfect on it's own, not to be defined by those I'm around, but by what the Lord has instilled within me to resonate as rest.
Lord, may I never lose who You created me to be. May I never be so caught up in the people or situations around me that I lose sight of the things You have fostered inside me to be passionate for. May my desires match Yours and my rest be decidedly from You. You are good. Thank You for the grace of simple joys.